Well, my Sunday is off to a rocky start haha. I guess it’s nothing too bad, just feels like bad luck. This morning I woke up and then had to deal with plumbing issues. That’s not a metaphor for anything. Literal plumbing issues. Tons of fun right there… Then when I was fixing my breakfast I was using the fancy espresso/latte/coffee machine that my aunt got my mom a really long time ago, and when I was about to steam my milk for my chai tea latte, it used up all the water. Boo… I thought I could pour more water into the top of it, but it was so hot and I didn’t want to break it (because that would happen to me). Microwave it was. So I exaggerated some, but I hope things go a little smoother for me for the rest of the day. Since I missed blogging yesterday I feel like I have to much to catch up on! Where to begin…
When my dad got home from getting the RV fixed my mom and I made dinner. We decided not to go out just because my dad had a busy day. So we used what we had on hand, which just happened to be burgers. Two Friday nights in a row with burgers! I think I’m all burgered out. It was good though. We had mixed veggies and tots as our sides. Then for my bed time snack I went with a pumpkin greek yogurt from Trader Joe’s 🙂 How did that get in there??!
Yesterday started off like our normal Saturdays. I woke up and fixed my breakfast. My mom helped me to use the steamer for my chai latte. Perhaps I just need supervision to operate that thing. I heated up one of my breakfast sandwiches and had a sliced banana with pomegranate seeds. Very good! I worked on my puzzles and talked with my mom. We planned out the upcoming week’s dinners and then went crazy with cleaning the kitchen! It almost doesn’t even look like the same kitchen! For my snack I had pretzels and a caramel nut brownie Luna bar.Pretty good, but not my favorite flavor. Then I did a few more chores and then went to the couch to relax. This is when my Saturday turned into an 8 on my social and food anxiety scale. My friend Josh said that he and his friends had an extra ticket to the Duke vs Miami game and he invited me to go with them. At first I just wanted to stay home and stay in my comfort zone and plan out what needed to be done for my closet project. My dad told me I needed to go because Duke has a good team this year and because what else was I going to do? When an opportunity for a challenge presents itself I have really been trying to push myself to conquering the challenge. So I accepted the invitation. I was nervous because I wasn’t sure if it would be awkward or not since I didn’t know his friends very well. I have always been really shy and social situations have always caused me anxiety. Plus, I wasn’t sure how I was going to deal with being out of my comfort zone and making sure I stayed on top of my bubbles. I had no choice but to quickly get ready and plan my lunch and snack. I scarfed down my cheese pretzel nuggets and then ate my apple and bagel on the way. I felt much better knowing I had my lunch and snack planned out. That way I wouldn’t get anxiety at the game, and I wouldn’t have to pay copious amounts of money for concessions. Josh and his friends, Justin and Tyler, ended up being really chill and I wasn’t uncomfortable or nervous at all. It probably helped that I didn’t have a huge crush on any of them like a 13 year old girl on Justin Bieber… That always takes my anxiety way down to a normal level haha. I have been around Justin a few times before, so I knew him a decent amount. I knew Tyler, but I never really talked to him before, but we bonded over dead people. I know, I know, that’s really weird. He works at a funeral home and he loves it and I worked on cadavers a lot for a few classes I took at Appalachian. So we had something to talk about haha. They all were extremely friendly and so they made the social challenge very easy for me. Plus Josh knows of my situation, so I knew he would be understanding if I was having any struggles. The game was so much fun! Duke won 48-30. I was shocked! The students stormed the field. After the game we stopped at Don Cecilios for dinner. I was planning on just going home to have lasagna, but they all wanted to somewhere and I really didn’t want to be complicated. So that kept me at a level 8. I ordered a chicken burrito with rice and beans and I ate the majority of it. They all are really easy to talk to. Well, for me it’s more like listen to haha. They had so many inside jokes and they just converse at a ridiculously fast pace. They are all pretty southern, so it’s not that they were talking too fast, they just had so many jokes or comebacks that they fired at each other with impressive quickness. Safe to say I was lost for over half of the conversations they had, but Justin and Tyler didn’t hesitate to fill me in on what they were talking about when they noticed the confusion on my face. After dinner we all went back to Josh’s house and watched Olympus Has Fallen. It was a lot better than I was expecting it to be! I had fun with them and I was glad I decided to join them on their activities for the day. I was proud of myself for leaving my shell and doing things that would normally give me so much anxiety. I am learning that if I just relax and enjoy the current moment without over thinking my anxiety level is substantially lower! Upon departing from Josh’s house I thanked Josh for the invite, Justin for the extra ticket, and then was offered a tour of a funeral home by Tyler.
When I got home I snuggled up on the couch and had pumpkin green yogurt again for my snack. A few random things that happened yesterday: My parents decided to go to the Lake in the RV for the night since I made plans. I was so happy they decided to get away because they deserved some daughterless time haha. I also heard from Em, my roommate from last Spring Semester at App. She was diagnosed with thyroid cancer and is scared about an upcoming appointment in December. She said it hasn’t spread any where so she should be good. I told her to keep me updated and to let me know if she ever needed anything. She asked how I was doing and was so happy to hear I was doing better. It was so nice to catch up with her! Looking back on it, yesterday was a good day for me. I can’t be sure if I filled all my bubbles, but I defeated many of my anxieties!
Ahhh, I love it when I get full days of alone time. I get to relax as much as I want or take as much time on something as I want. My dad was a few hours away in Marion getting some work done on the RV. He left yesterday afternoon and should be back tonight around dinner time. My mom was at work all day so I got to do my own thing 🙂
Last night my mom and I had chile lime chicken burgers topped with sauteed peppers and onions with a side of pretzels and guacamole. It was just alright. I think the meat was a little overcooked. Then we relaxed on the couch and watched Life Or Something Like It. One of my favorite movies! For snack I had a banana and brownies from Trader Joe’s with a glass of milk. Then I was ready for bed!
This morning I was up early but relaxed a little before getting out of bed. While my tea heated up I planned out my morning. For my breakfast I made an egg with peppers, onions and cheddar. I also had an oh so yummy pumpkin bagel and a banana! I worked on today’s sudoku and crossword puzzle before I went to the couch to watch The Vampire Diaries and Scandal. I recorded both shows last night.
For my morning snack I had a bowl of apple cinnamon Cheerios and trail mix. So flavorful for something so simple! Then I was off to the barn! Vinnie was a little bit better today when I lunged him up in the arena. He still had a few moments where he turned away from me. But I worked him at the “scary” end of the arena and even let out all of the lunge line and moved with him so he could go all the way around the arena. That got him going! He had a good work out today. Pre-lunge: Post-lunge: Somebody was worn out!
When I made it back home I fixed my lunch and then did lots of internet surfing haha! I made one of my best turkey sandwiches. It featured fresh lettuce leaves and freshly sliced tomato. I had V8 V-Fusion and a glass of milk along with 4 mini snickers. I might have looked up what a serving size of mini snickers is. Shhh…
I then did some chores. I took out all the garbage and made a trip to the dump since I had the truck again. I then put away all of my laundry and semi-cleaned my room. I am hoping tomorrow my dad will want to help me finish my closet project! Or at least get close to finishing it. While I was cleaning up my room I found a little pamphlet from a food magazine and it had 50 recipe ideas for pumpkin. I definitely bookmarked a few of them! Hi, I’m Beth, I’m a pumpkaholic.
Eventually I decided to take a nice hot shower before fixing my second snack of the day. I seeded my first pomegranate! It is quite the process but it tasted so good! I topped some strawberry barley with some of the seeds. The strawberry barley was an experiment I created yesterday. I cooked barley and then added a wedge of Laughing Cow Strawberries and Cream Cream Cheese. I kept it in the fridge and then heated it up in the microwave before I ate it. It was pretty darn good! Similar to oatmeal, but a little more dense/chewy?
Then I emptied and loaded the dishwasher and then my mom was home to officially put an end to my day alone. Not complaining though 🙂 I enjoyed the day to myself but I am looking forward to whatever my parents and I get into these next two days!
Today has been the best Thursday ever! Well, one of them anyways haha. My mom was the winner of the weight gain bet, so she got to pick her prize. She ended up choosing a MASSIVE gift for me! We looked at saddles online and ended up ordering an inexpensive saddle package including the saddle, girth, stirrup leathers and irons. I love it so much! Sadly the saddle my aunt gave me didn’t work for Vinnie, but this new saddle is the best reward for my gain that I could have asked for! It was so generous of my mom 🙂
So last night I made dinner and it was really, really good. Thanks Kraft Recipe Makers! Three Cheese Chicken Florentine:
Then for snack I made another mint chocolate chip milkshake. Mmmm!
This morning I woke up and was so relieved when my dad said I didn’t have to go to work since he was only going to be there for a short amount of time. So I fixed my breakfast and ate it with my mom. I had another pumpkin bagel & cream cheese with trail mix, a V8 V-Fusion, and cherry tea. I then worked on my daily puzzles before doing a few chores. Then it was eventually time for my snack. My dad came back home about the same time I was about to have my snack, so he really wasn’t at work long! I had oatmeal topped with cinnamon and walnuts along with a glass of milk. Once I finished it I was off to the barn! I drove the truck since my dad was expecting to need the Jeep. The Jeep is the only vehicle that can be towed behind the RV and the RV needed a few repairs so we can winterize it. There are also a few other things that need worked on. But my dad was more than likely going to need to hook up the Jeep while I was at the barn. I love driving the truck! Today I decided to lunge Vinnie in the arena. I didn’t do it with tack on because I don’t want to overuse Barb’s offer of letting me use her saddle. Plus I didn’t want to lunge him in the arena with tack on since he hasn’t been up there in so long. I figured it would be a good idea to let him get desensitized to the arena again before I started riding him. It is a good thing I didn’t tack him up today because he was trying lots of his old tricks! He was being quite the back talker but I was still able to get him to do what I wanted after expressing to him that I was in charge. So I would count it as a good lunge, even though he was acting out some.
When I got home the RV was parked in the driveway ready to roll. My dad left for Tom Johnson a few minutes after I got home. I was just starting to prepare my lunch when my dad called me and asked me if the Jeep was in the driveway… It definitely wasn’t there. My dad said it wasn’t behind the RV so the hitch system must have broken somehow. He told me to jump in the truck and go look for the Jeep. I high tailed it out of the neighborhood and then called to make sure I was driving in the right direction. After a few second my dad said “Oh. Nevermind. The Jeep is still attached. The camera for the back is still broken and I didn’t see the Jeep in the mirrors when I turned.” I was so relieved! I was scared about what we would have had to do because I was sure the Jeep was going to be totaled or the cause of a major accident. So I was happy that it was all a mistake. I went home and continued to fix my lunch. I mixed up a little salad and had a turkey sandwich, grapes, chips, and yogurt. I did lots of relaxing for the rest of the day mixed in with a few chores. Then I did a little breakfast prepping. I made 4 breakfast sandwiches and stuck them in the freezer. Each sandwich features an egg, a slice of cheese, peppers and onion on honey whole wheat bread. There was also some hot sauce and red pepper flakes mixed in with the eggs. I cooked my eggs differently this time. I whisked 4 eggs together and added my spices. I sprayed a 9×9 with cooking spray and then poured the eggs in it. I then sprinkled in chopped green peppers and onions. I baked it in the oven at 350 for about 30 minutes. If you try this out I would keep an eye on it to make sure it doesn’t overcook. Then I lightly toasted my bread and then cut the eggs into 4 squares then placed a square on 4 slices of break and topped each egg with a slice of cheese and then the other slices of bread. I wrapped them in plastic wrap and stuck them in the freezer! My plan to reheat them is to just unwrap the plastic and then wrap it in a paper towel and then start by microwaving it for 1 minute and then 30 seconds to 1 minute if it needs more time.
I then had a hot pocket for a snack and just when I finished it my mom came home. I spent some time talking with her and then we snuggled up on the warm couch and looked at saddles! I still am shocked that she ordered one for me! Best mom of the year award goes to her!
Since my dad isn’t here for dinner we are going to create something that we know he wouldn’t really like haha! Girl’s night for us 🙂
Hope everyone had a good Thursday!
Hello! How was everyone’s Wednesday? Mine seemed to fly right by.
Last night I watched my favorite Tuesday night TV shows, Brooklyn Nine Nine and New Girl. I made my self a true college-aged person’s dinner. I just wanted wanted to use up stuff that we had so I let the freezer be my buffet. I had pepper jack stuffed pretzels, a chicken bacon cheddar hot pocket, pot stickers, carrots, and a glass of milk. It all was actually really delicious. It made me super sleepy too. Before I fell asleep I had my snack which was just a greek yogurt and Blueberry Blaze trail mix. I love the thickness of the Fage 2%!
Wednesday’s weapon of choice…
This morning I woke up excited to eat a pumpkin bagel. That is my new favorite weapon for fighting Eduardo! I wish it could be Fall forever so that all these pumpkin flavored things would stick around! I put together my lunch and snacks and then toasted my bagel. I topped it with cinnamon cream cheese, ate it with a double serving of trail mix, a glass of milk, a glass of orange juice, and a mug of blueberry tea. Hydration to the max! I ate it while my dad and I drove into work. While I work I just did a few small things that Tammy gave me to do. It wasn’t a busy day for me at all. I ended up working on sudoku and crossword puzzles for the majority of the afternoon. For my morning snack I had a tasty Luna Bar. For lunch I packed a turkey and cheese sandwich, an apple, carrots, and sun chips. We ended up leaving an hour early to stop at Walmart and get antifreeze for the RV so my dad could put it in before it got dark. We also stopped at the meat market so I could get chicken for dinner since we forgot to thaw the chicken in the freezer. Then I ate some maple yogurt and a few brownie bites, from Trader Joe’s, while we drove the rest of the way home. Now I am just having some nice down time.
Today was a good day for me, no difficult challenges. It was very laid back as well. Nothing too exciting haha.
Tonight I am making dinner using one of the Kraft Recipe Makers, so I am hoping it is good!
So today has been a great day! Last night was pretty good too. For dinner my mom made pork chops, brussels sprouts, and baked potatoes. Yum! We watched the Monday night shows and then for snack I had a delicious chocolate cranberry roll from Trader Joe’s with some vanilla cinnamon milk I mixed up. That roll was fantastic!
Now lets get to the really good stuff…
This morning I woke up and made myself breakfast. Have you ever had a pumpkin bagel? No? You are really missing out. Topped with some cream cheese and you’re in heaven. I had it with some trail mix, orange juice, and a cup of raspberry tea. I worked on the sudoku puzzle and crossword puzzle from USA Today online while I ate my breakfast. I didn’t have to go to work with my dad today since he was only going to be there for a short amount of time. So I spent my morning off by putting my brain to work on puzzles and then took a nice relaxing shower before deciding to do some vacuuming. My cat has flipped her looney switch and has been ripping out her hair so our house was in dire need of some attention. Once I was done with that chore I had my snack of yogurt and a Larabar. Before I knew it my dad was home and then we were off to Chapel Hill because he needed to see a client. We weren’t there very long but while my dad worked I played fetch with the dogs. Of course I took some pictures because I know of a few readers who are basset hound lovers 😉 I also adore black labs (especially when they play fetch!) and then this golden retriever was such an old sweetheart.
For lunch my dad and I hit up McAlister’s Deli. I ordered the Choose Two and had broccoli cheddar soup and a grilled chicken spud. Amazing combination! Good bubble filler too haha. Then it was time for Dr. Chung! My appointment was short and sweet. I mostly talked with a woman who I think was getting her clinic hours in or something. She then summed up everything we talked about when she updated Dr. Chung. I was given the usual check up and I asked him if I could start riding. Mary thought I was ready to start so she wanted me to ask Dr. Chung about it. After talking with my parents he said I would be able to start riding as long as I didn’t over do it. I am still not allowed any other physical activity though 😦 But being able to ride again is still incredible! I am going to have to start back slow anyways because Vinnie is going to need to relearn a lot of the basics involving collection and everything. So it will probably be a lot of walking haha. So I was very pleased to receive that news. I also gained, yayayay! My mom guessed closest to the amount I gained so she won the bet. She has no idea what she wants her prize to be yet haha. I also got my flu shot. I am typically not a firm believer in the flu shot, but I figured why not give it a try.
Then it was off to Mary’s! We made a quick pit stop at Lowe’s because my dad wanted to show me some ideas he had for finishing up my closet project. He has some good ones! When we arrived at Mary’s she immediately gave me a huge hug and congratulated me on my progress. She and I then had a one on one session and we discussed all of the “assignments” I did from the workbook she let me borrow. We went over all the work I did, including a list of things I want to control but can’t, a self test to see what aspects of my eating disorder were the one’s fueling it, I shared what I wrote about a reason I thought my eating disorder developed and I also shared my difficult situations revolving around food, body image, and other situations. She did a wonderful job with helping me to analyze everything I came up with and she really emphasized how important it is to embrace who I naturally am and to show people the real me instead of comparing myself to others and trying to create a person that everyone will accept. Mary is so thoughtful and caring. She gave me a nice little reminder that is a little card stating “Just Be” and she also told me she was going to bake me the pumpkin seed recipe that tried and failed to make. She was also kind enough to share a personal story about something she is planning on doing in the very near future. It was a way of telling me that the future is meant to be unknown and out of our control but that we do have the power to do certain things that we have wanted to do and that will bring great satisfaction to ourselves and others. Great session with Mary!
While waiting for our appointment with Lori I ate a banana and pretzels while I worked on another sudoku puzzle and crossword puzzle from the newspaper my dad bought. When it was time, Lori greeted me with another congratulations! She had already heard from the others that I had made significant progress. We then quickly discussed the past week and then moved on to talking about my ways of coping with anxiety. We talked a lot about the public speaking example and then about social situations. I really gained a lot from that session because I realized my ways of coping often include avoiding if possible. That is probably why I never really put myself out there socially. I never felt comfortable doing activities with friends. With those situations, and with public speaking, I would just feel nervous and whenever I am nervous I turn this horrendous blotchy red color all over my face, neck, chest and arms. I never liked the attention I got from turning red and often times I would psych myself out and turn red just by thinking about turning red. So because I anticipated this it just made me more nervous and gave me all the more reason to avoid situations as much as possible that involved talking to a group of people or being around a group of people, particularly a guy I liked. Booo. I have gotten better with my anxiety when it comes to public speaking and social situations, but I will admit I still get nervous. Lori assigned me with coming up with a hierarchy for social situations, or giving different hypothetical situations a number on the anxiety scale. This just makes me want to work more on overcoming my fears and anxiety that are involved with normal everyday things that don’t involve food. Good goal, right?
So all of my appointments went very well today and I couldn’t be happier!
How was your Tuesday?