First half of the week is in the books!

Wow… I haven’t posted an update in a while! I feel like I only really have a few things to mention from the past few days. Let’s see, I’ll start with Monday if I can remember that far back!

Breakfast was banana bread. 1I had a dentist appointment early Monday morning in Roxboro. It went well as always. Then I was off to work. It was a really good day at work. I mainly worked on getting product up online, but I also just had a nice time talking with my co-workers. They are such a fun group. For snack I had yogurt and a kind bar.2 My mom dropped off lunch for me. She got me a huge turkey sandwich from Whole Foods, along with fruits and veggies. 3

When I got home from work, the power was off so I had a yogurt and a WhatsoNutso bar for my snack before heading out to the barn to ride.4 Just before I was about to ride my parents showed up at the barn and said that they were going to go pick something up for dinner since the power was still out. There was a moment when some eating disordered thoughts crept into my mind. I was quickly going through all the options of takeout and labeling it as acceptable or not. I just couldn’t decided on anything that sounded good so I told my parents to just get something because they know what I like. I think Vinnie could pick up on my discontent a little because the beginning of the ride was a mess. He kept freaking out at one end of the arena and I probably was letting my anger control the situation instead of handling things in a calmer fashion. The ride got better though and we ended on a good note. Think I wore him out? Hahaha.5

When I got home later in the night the power was back on and I was surprised to find that my parents just picket up a rotisserie chicken, sweet potatoes and veggies. 6

So that was an interesting dilemma I found myself in. I guess eating out or getting take out unexpectedly is still a little bit of a sore spot for me to work on.

Tuesday

Tuesday morning I was up early to hit the gym with my boss! On the way in to Durham I had two slices of my banana bread.7 At the gym we did strength training, targeting our legs. Holy cow, at the time it didn’t seem like much but later in the day and all day today we sure were feeling it!

After our workout I came home since I had the day off and then I fixed my second breakfast. I made a spinach scramble using two of the farm fresh eggs from the barn 🙂 Yum! I also had some strawberries. 8

I read some of my book and then took a reallllyyy long nap haha. When I woke up I read some more and watched a little TV before fixing my lunch. I used leftovers to make a veggie, chicken and sweet potato hash that I had with blueberries, cashews and a greek yogurt.9 I relaxed until it was time for me to get ready to go have my appointment with Mary. I had a kind bar for my snack before going in to meet with her. 10

I had a really good session with Mary yesterday. I kept a food log over the past week and we looked at each day to see what percentages of my intake were coming from carbs, protein and fat. She told me that it seemed like I was falling a little short on my carbohydrates, especially since I am being so active. So we talked about things that might be holding me back a little bit when it comes to carbs and we made goals for myself. We also did a nutritional analysis on one of the days that most reflected my typical day to get a more in depth look at if I was getting the right percentages when it comes to all of my carbs, veggies, fruits, proteins, fats, vitamins and other nutrients. It was just an overall informational session! It was funny how last week we wanted to look at my protein numbers but it turned out to be my carbs that were falling short.

After my appointment I headed straight out to the barn so I could ride with Renee before it got dark. We went on a trail ride since she just wanted to do something light with G since she left today to go to a show! Jealous. Anyways, I was super impressed with Vinnie because I jumped right on him and went down the rode without warming him up in the arena or anything, and he was amazing! It was getting dark outside and he usually freaks out but he was so, so, so well behaved. I was thrilled 🙂 I helped Renee feed the horses and chatted for a bit before heading home.

For dinner my parents made roasted veggies and ravioli.11 Very tasty! I had a low key night and then had an apple and an almond butter sandwich before heading off to bed.

Today

This morning I was up early again to meet Bryan at the gym. He expressed his hatred of me since I made him so sore yesterday morning haha! On my way in I ate the remaining two slices of my banana bread. Today we ran on the treadmills for 30 minutes for our workout. I really had to push myself today, but it felt good when I was finished.12

At work all I did was put up product on the website. I got 20 women’s shirt completely finished. After adding all of the information on the website I had blueberries, greek yogurt and almonds for my snack.13 Then I went to take pictures of all the shirts in the video room. After I took all the pictures I had to edit them before I could add them to the website. I took a break to have my lunch. I had an apple and leftover veggies and ravioli. 14

When I got home from work I sat out on the porch swing for a bit and watched a storm roll in as I ate a kind bar for my snack. I was going to sit out there and read some but then it became extremely windy and it started to rain so I headed inside.15

Well, I think now you are officially up to date! I am taking care of the horses while Renee and Marty are at the show so I am off to feed them!

Hope you have been having a great week so far!

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Self-growth From Finding Challenges

Do you ever hear people say that there is always something that needs to be worked on? I find that to be true. I think there is a healthy way to always challenge yourself though. We don’t need any of that obsessive perfectionistic vibes floating around! I am talking about the small daily challenges that one might face and working on overcoming those to better yourself in a way that bring you complete and total happiness. Who doesn’t want that? I will forever be finding new ways to push myself so that I am living the life I want to live.

I was up early this morning to meet Mary at 7:40 for my appointment. I had work afterwards so we kind of jumped right in to discussing this past week and the upcoming week. The big things we talked about were breakfasts and then eating out. I mentioned to her how it has been a little difficult to come up with something to have for breakfast when I know I have a small window of time, such as when I wake up to go to the gym in the morning. I want to come up with a good breakfast and morning snack that is satisfying and gives me necessary nutrients. So we compared what my breakfast was like on a day when I can cook breakfast at home and have an easy going morning with what my breakfast and morning snack is like when I am up early to go to the gym. We talked about a few ideas for meals that could be prepared in a pinch if I didn’t prep my breakfast the night before. Another challenge I still face that I would like to work on to bring more joy and spontaneity in my life is eating out. I haven’t eaten out in quite a while but it is something that people do all the time, so we talked about that for a bit. I told her that my parents and I are going to go out Friday night, hopefully to a new place, and I am going to order something that the place is really known for. That way I can really get the full experience of the restaurant and who knows, maybe I will taste something that changes my life! Mary also gave me another book to look through that she thought I would enjoy 🙂

After my appointment with Mary I went to work. I had my breakfast while I worked.Image I had a great time at work. We got the store completely restocked and then I got some reorders figured out for my boss. The people I work with really just make the day amazing. They are the most entertaining people I know! I wish my boss could have been there though. I feel so bad that he is sick right now! I took a break to have my lunch. I packed some leftovers along with strawberries.Image

When I got home at 6 I had a Kashi bar for my snack and then got started on a few things online for UNC. I also got some work done for the online store for the Bulls! I felt very productive this evening. I was supposed to hang out with my neighbor tonight but he was tired after a crazy day so that didn’t happen, which is fine because I got to watch the Penguins win their game! That and my mom made a delicious dinner 🙂Image

I packed up my lunch and snacks for tomorrow and then made overnight oatmeal for my early morning breakfast before I go to the gym with my mom. Then I work 9-5! I like these weekday hours.

Think it, Feel it, Make it Happen

Happy Wednesday! Half way to the weekend. Is everyone excited?

This morning I woke up and got dressed before I fixed a quick breakfast. I had to hurry to eat it so I could make it to Mary’s by 8, but it was still tasty and satisfying! I had an orange, some carrots, a chai latte and a bowl of granola with almond milk. Image

My time with Mary flew by! I began by telling her about my weekend in PA. I told her about my amazing and spontaneous experience with the guy I met on the plane. Talking the entire flight and then having breakfast with him at the Detroit airport was something that I never would have been able to do two years ago. Two years ago I would have been socially paralyzed by the fears I had with engaging in conversation and just pushing myself to be spontaneous and have breakfast with a stranger. I told Mary how in high school I avoided everything. Literally, I avoided talking in class, I avoided guys I liked, I avoided doing things outside of school with friends, all because I was so scared that body would betray me by showing my nerves and anxiety. I was known for turning beet red all over. I hated it so I did everything to avoid it. I connected it to the book I am reading that Mary lent me: Ask and it is Given. When you want or ask for something in life, you have to be mentally aligned with those wishes as well or else there is no way you will achieve what you want. If you think negatively, then events in life are going to reflect that. So I told Mary how I used to simply have to think about turning red and my body would do so. We talked about that for a while and she told me how people with eating disorders can also do something similar. They can think themselves full. I used to do that by vicariously eating through others or by watching the food network. My thoughts were strong enough to convince my body it wasn’t hungry, even though it was starving. She shared this really interesting article she heard on NPR. Mind Over Milkshakes. After talking about that we talked more about the book I am reading and we looked at one of the exercises in it to help get as close to joy as possible. It was just a really great, uplifting session!

I went to work after my time with Mary and spent the morning working on the online orders. Then I added more product to the online store. My mom dropped me off lunch from Whole Foods and I took her up through the dugout to show her the new stadium since she hadn’t seen it yet. It was a nice little midday visit from her! Lunch was yummy too. Two hardboiled eggs with veggies and quinoa, grapes and pineapple, yogurt and a WhatsoNutso bar.Image I spent the rest of the afternoon taking pictures of apparel and photoshopping it to get it ready to put up online. I took work home with me… I am going to try and get the pictures finished so on Saturday when I work again they will be ready to be put up.

I had a Kashi bar when I got home before I headed out to the barn. I had a great ride! I rode Vinnie in a simple straight rein today and I thought he did very well. There were a few moments when he stuck his head up and I could have used the leverage of the German martingale, but it was nothing major 🙂 Renee rode Ray at the same time so we also got practice with having traffic in the arena. I helped Renee with feeding the horses before I left for home.ImageDark picture, but Vinnie was hungry!

When I got home I watched the Penguins game and relaxed. My mom made a delicious dinner: Grilled chicken, grilled zucchini, sauteed peppers and onions, pepperjack cheese. Then I heated up a tiny sweet potato and topped it with a laughing cow wedge. Yum! Image

Now I am going to go try and figure out if I have the program I need on my laptop in order to get these pictures ready for work. Have a good night!

Art Field Trip and Reunion with Vinnie

This morning I woke up feeling well rested and ready to take on the day! I got ready for work before I made my breakfast. I fix a red pepper scramble, a chai latte and a bowl of oatmeal topped with berries.Image Then I was off to work! When I got to the Bulls I got started on pulling items for the online orders. A bit before 10 all of the staff hit the road to go to the art museum in Raleigh. There was the opening of the Bull City Summer exhibit which featured photography taken by several artists last summer. There is a book that was published and so this exhibit displayed a few pieces. It was really interesting to see everything through a different perspective. I enjoyed it very much and it was nice to think about the park and baseball in a different way. After the tour of the exhibit we all went to the restaurant at the museum for lunch. I was disappointed that we were not given the menu to order for ourselves. The lunch that was given us was still good, but it was slightly difficult to be completely comfortable with it. There was a little side salad, a pasta and the chicken was breaded and fried, topped with a mushroom sauce.Image The voice in my head was telling me that I should refrain from eating it because the fat content was sure to be higher than what I was used to eating. But I was able to get over that, mostly because I didn’t was to isolate myself from the social event of enjoying lunch and the company of my co-workers. I ate until I felt satisfied, doing my best to listen to the signals from my body.

Once lunch was over we headed back to the Bulls stadium. I worked on getting the remainder of the caps and the 47 Brand apparel up on the website. That was pretty much the remainder of my work day!

When I got home I had a quick snack before I headed out to the barn to spend time with Vinnie.Image I gave him a good brushing before I tacked him up to ride. He was such a good boy! I just did a quick ride but he was excellent and I had a great time 🙂 Image I talked to Renee for a few minutes and then helped feed by giving Vinnie his sweet feed and hay before I left. When I got home I started making my dinner. I fixed penne with leftover chicken sausage and squash. I also steamed up some broccoli and topped it with a wedge of Laughing Cow white cheddar. It was very yummy!Image Then I watched Cocktail with my parents. Now I am going to go have a snack before I catch some sleep. I have my appointment with Mary bright and early in the morning before I got to work!

Busy, Busy, Busy!

Good Morning!

I only have a few minutes to do a quick post before I have to head off to work!

Yesterday

My appointment with Mary was fantastic! We talked briefly about my new potential client and I am going to be so excited if I get to start cooking for her! I then told her my news (getting accepted to UNC) and she was so happy for me! I then told her about my last week, and I apologized that my detail food log was not so detailed haha. I have just been so busy that I haven’t been keeping up with it like I should have been, but then we discussed how great it was that I wasn’t being consumed by making everything perfect and having to know exactly what I was eating. Remember my bubble sheets? I would sit down and bubble in exactly what I was about to eat or had just eaten. And I let the bubbles kind of control what I ate. Now I have good mental judgement of what a good meal or snack should look like and I don’t need the bubbles. Plus, I am learning to listen to my hunger/fullness/satiety levels. There were a few suggestions Mary made to add a little something to a few of the meals I did record, but other than that she said I was doing great and it is a huge thing that I am not worried about recording everything I eat so I can know exactly what I fed my body. It feels so great to be at that point! Then Mary gave me a book to do some reading in. I accidentally left it in my car and I can’t remember the title off the top of my head, but I will share it will you soon!

A few pictures to sum of my meals/snacks during my long day at work.

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Today

This morning I was up very early. I think I am just beyond excited to be going to PA tomorrow! I drank my water as I worked on the crossword puzzle. Then I tried out a new workout app on my phone since I wanted to do a workout at home so I could take a relaxing shower and make a nice breakfast instead of going to the Y.

I only did one round of the ab exercises. I will have to work up to 3 haha!ImageImageImageWhew! Good arm workout for me. I have weak little arms haha.

Now I am enjoying a nice breakfast (there’s oatmeal and granola somewhere under those berries) before I go to work.Image I will be at work all day and into the night since there is a game. I am going to pack for the weekend when I get home and then I will head off to the airport for my flight at 6:00 am! So this might be my last post until I return on Sunday. If so I hope you have a wonderful Easter weekend!

Let Go and Life Happens

Today’s session with Mary was so great! I like how we talk about things that are completely unrelated to nutrition. I mean, the topics can always be applied someway to relate to a challenge that I have with food, but getting different perspectives on other aspects of life to try and achieve maximum happiness. We both get sidetracked easily during conversation, but that is what makes each session so much fun! We began by talking about her son’s jazz show he was doing tonight that she was attending. He plays the upright bass and had to compose music for everyone else playing tonight. That was interesting to talk about and I hope his show went well! Afterwards I began by talking about my past week. I told her that I pretty much worked all day every day but on Sunday I was able to go to the barn. She asked me what my plan was with Vinnie and I told her that I was thinking about the possibility of showing him again (since my mom and Renee discovered the secret to making horses calm at shows) but maybe just starting with open shows. It is just an idea at the moment. Mary then asked me to describe what showing was like. To me, showing is such a rush of so many emotions. There is excitement and adrenaline mixed with gut wrenching nerves. The feeling after you finish a class is worth all the sweat and tears you poured to get there. Putting yourself out there to be judged and coming out on the other side is such a big accomplishment and something to be proud of, whether or not you won first place or came in last. I always felt like I overcame my biggest fear when I was done with the class and it always made me want to turn right around and do it again. Overcoming fear is just exhilarating. We eventually started talking about the actual food part of my week, and I made a few goals:

  • Be more spontaneous at work: go out to lunch with people if they are going. Be aware of my inner response to the situation and how I feel from the moment it is presented through the time we are eating. Order something that sounds very good. Notice if I am scared of that food. All of these will help me to bond socially with people.
  • Time my meals better while I am at work. Food is not a reward – don’t delay lunch or snack until I am finished with a task. If I am hungry I need to take my break and eat. Even if I am worrying about my task while I am eating, it is still important not to put off nourishing my body, not all eating opportunities are going to be relaxing.

When we talked about social bonding Mary shared a story with me from her weekend at her beach art retreat. She was reading on a bridge because it was just the perfect spot. A woman walked by and said she was searching for a place to read. The woman eventually came back and said that the bridge was the perfect place to read. Mary told her she was about to go have dinner so she could take her spot on the bridge. Well, Mary said her and the woman ended up talking for a while. The woman just really needed to talk about a problem she was having. People aren’t meant to hold everything in and sometimes you just have to say words out loud to realize what needs to be done. Mary of course told the story with much more detail and eloquence, but that was the gist of it. I said it was wonderful how she acted as a human canvas for this woman. She just needed to express everything in her mind and she did so by using Mary as a vessel to hold on to everything that flowed out.

At the end of the session I told her how I was starting to get nervous about my school situation. I should hear back from UNC in about a week and I will hear from State mid-May. She gave me wonderful advice: breath. The right school will happen. I can’t control everything and I should just ket the universe take care of it. The universe will put me in the right place. What ever happens will be the best thing to occur and something wonderful will come from it. Let go and life happens. Sometimes if you try and control things too much, they end up going out of control or pushing away. That was wonderful advice and of course she had a terrific story to go along with the advice. Mary’s stories are the best! She is just amazing. She is like the super nutritionist!

After that appointment I headed home, making a quick stop to get a USB memory stick. I heated up leftovers for lunch and threw an apple in as a side.Image

I worked on transferring pictures to the memory stick before I headed to the barn to hangout with Vinnie! I had a great time grooming and then sitting on the fence watching him. Soooo relaxing 🙂 ImageImageImageImageImage

When I got back home I started cleaning and reorganizing my room. I had to scrape paint up off the floor before I vacuumed and rearranged. I took a break during my room project to have pretzels and greek yogurt.Image

My mom made dinner tonight: turkey burgers, roasted brussels and zucchini. I just had the brussels and then had an addition of a small sweet potato.Image

Now I am watching this intense Pirates game! Hope you had a good day!

Goal: Work With No Excuses

I have literally spent my entire day at work. Yesterday, too, when I wasn’t at my appointments. Last night I got home and had dinner at 11:30 so I was just way too tired to do my daily post. Tonight I was able to leave earlier so I am taking advantage to do a reallllyyy quick update before I have snack and go to bed. I NEED TO SLEEP. Tomorrow is opening day at the ballpark and we still have like a week worth of things that need to be done, so I am going to be going in really early and I will be there till the last person leaves, so more than likely there will be no post tomorrow either. So… Where to begin?

Yesterday

I woke up early to go to the Y with my mom before clocking in at 8. I followed my mom’s lead and did a 40 minute strength training workout. It was a good one. I felt the burn as I did the exercises but it didn’t make me sore. Before the Y I had a banana and after the Y for my morning snack I had overnight oatmeal made with strawberry Greek yogurt.Image I worked on personalizations for online orders all morning before I went to my appointment with Mary. My session went really well! I have my goals made and we talked about creativity and how to differentiate between different types of satiety. It is also my goal to be more spontaneous when I am at work. I have been coming up with excuses to not partake in the eating activities that others do. A lot of people go grab a quick bite out and I haven’t felt comfortable doing that, which makes me wait till I get home to eat dinner and I end up eating too late and going too long in between meals and snacks.

After that I met my mom at Whole Foods for lunch. I had a rice, veggie and egg mixture, mixed fruit and greek yogurt.Image After sitting and talking with my mom for a while I ran to the bank before heading over to my appointment with Lori. I can’t believe that yesterday was my last appointment with Lori. I am really going to miss working with her. We briefly talked about my homework from the past week before we reflected on what I have learned over the past year. We also discussed techniques that really worked for me so that I can use them in the future. It was a good way to wrap up our time together.

After my session I had a new bar for my snack.Image Then I went back to work! I worked until 10:40. I am so glad it was fun though!

When I made it home I reheated what was left from my parent’s dinner. I threw the chicken on sliced bread with a wedge of white cheddar laughing cow. There was also some really tasty baked zucchini and yellow squash. Then as my immediate bedtime snack I had some berries, trail mix and milk.ImageImage

Today

This morning I was up early to get ready for work. I got ready and then packed my lunch before having a quick banana and greek yogurt. Mid morning I had my almond butter sandwich.Image

I worked all day at folding t shirts. I did a few other things, but this was a task that felt never ending. For lunch I had leftover pork stuffing,  cauliflower, an apple and pretzels.Image I was feeling very stressed out because the t shirt tables weren’t getting done as quickly as I was hoping. After 2 my boss basically ordered me to go eat my lunch and relax for a minute. I was also getting stressed out because there were so many new people who came in to work during the afternoon and I felt like I had to keep telling them what to do which took up time for what ever I was working on. Either that or they would come over and try to work with me on what I was working on while there were other things that needed to be done. I dealt with it though. I was new once too haha. Time flew by and I ended up having my snack later than normal. I had another new bar which was surprisingly good.Image My stress level thankfully decreased over the night. I am so happy to have Casey back at work. She really brings the fun haha. She is also really thoughtful. She runs a lot and so we were talking about a half marathon and she was saying how she didn’t want me to become obsessive about it. She also checks to make sure I have eaten my lunch or snack. She is also hilarious so she is just a really good friend to have at work. There are some other really good people who work there who make the time really enjoyable!

As I drove home I ate some veggies and a turkey sandwich from Whole Foods.Image My mom was nice enough to drop me off some food for dinner so I wasn’t waiting until I got home to eat. She is so nice!

Alright, I am calling it a night! Wish me luck for the busy day tomorrow!