Self-growth From Finding Challenges

Do you ever hear people say that there is always something that needs to be worked on? I find that to be true. I think there is a healthy way to always challenge yourself though. We don’t need any of that obsessive perfectionistic vibes floating around! I am talking about the small daily challenges that one might face and working on overcoming those to better yourself in a way that bring you complete and total happiness. Who doesn’t want that? I will forever be finding new ways to push myself so that I am living the life I want to live.

I was up early this morning to meet Mary at 7:40 for my appointment. I had work afterwards so we kind of jumped right in to discussing this past week and the upcoming week. The big things we talked about were breakfasts and then eating out. I mentioned to her how it has been a little difficult to come up with something to have for breakfast when I know I have a small window of time, such as when I wake up to go to the gym in the morning. I want to come up with a good breakfast and morning snack that is satisfying and gives me necessary nutrients. So we compared what my breakfast was like on a day when I can cook breakfast at home and have an easy going morning with what my breakfast and morning snack is like when I am up early to go to the gym. We talked about a few ideas for meals that could be prepared in a pinch if I didn’t prep my breakfast the night before. Another challenge I still face that I would like to work on to bring more joy and spontaneity in my life is eating out. I haven’t eaten out in quite a while but it is something that people do all the time, so we talked about that for a bit. I told her that my parents and I are going to go out Friday night, hopefully to a new place, and I am going to order something that the place is really known for. That way I can really get the full experience of the restaurant and who knows, maybe I will taste something that changes my life! Mary also gave me another book to look through that she thought I would enjoy 🙂

After my appointment with Mary I went to work. I had my breakfast while I worked.Image I had a great time at work. We got the store completely restocked and then I got some reorders figured out for my boss. The people I work with really just make the day amazing. They are the most entertaining people I know! I wish my boss could have been there though. I feel so bad that he is sick right now! I took a break to have my lunch. I packed some leftovers along with strawberries.Image

When I got home at 6 I had a Kashi bar for my snack and then got started on a few things online for UNC. I also got some work done for the online store for the Bulls! I felt very productive this evening. I was supposed to hang out with my neighbor tonight but he was tired after a crazy day so that didn’t happen, which is fine because I got to watch the Penguins win their game! That and my mom made a delicious dinner 🙂Image

I packed up my lunch and snacks for tomorrow and then made overnight oatmeal for my early morning breakfast before I go to the gym with my mom. Then I work 9-5! I like these weekday hours.

Garage Day

Man oh man, did I put in some work today. After my breakfast of black beans, cheese, veggies, an egg and oatmeal with a latte I got started on “project: garage.” Image

We had about 85 boxes filled with old tax files piled up in our garage that were getting picked up to be destroyed. We have been trying to get this company to get the boxes for a while now and they finally followed throw with it. Just in time for our wood from the Reuse Ware house to be dropped off! I spent all morning moving boxes and dodging spiders. There were so many spiders. I thought I was going to be a goner. I ended up moving all the boxes 2 times before they got picked up. I did my best to clean and organize the garage. It was raining all day so I kept everything in the garage, which is why I ended up moving the boxes twice. I think I messed up my back during the cleaning process… I made a weird bendy/twisty movement to pick something up and it has been in pain ever since. That is what I get for lifting with my back and not my legs. I pushed through it though, no biggie. Garage after I cleaned: Image

Garage after wood was delivered and boxes were picked up:ImageImage

It was funny, the guys from the Reuse Warehouse showed up first and then the Cintax guy showed up a few minutes later. So I just got all the business knocked out at the same time!

Mid morning I took a break for my snack, which was a peanut butter banana and chocolate smoothie. Image

Once everything was finished around 2 I threw together a quick lunch. I made a 3 minute pasta portion and had it with tomato basil soup and spinach and then greek yogurt and berries. Yum!Image

I then relaxed the rest of the afternoon. It was rainy and gross so I wasn’t up for anything else after all that work in the garage.

For my second snack I had pretzels, turkey and raspberry jam. Holy cow, great combo.Image

We decided to go out for our Friday night dinner and we just went to Applebee’s. I really really pushed myself to order my big challenge for the week: ordering a cheeseburger and fries.Image I ate all the fries and half the burger and got a box. I think I did alright with that challenge. It was definitely hard because I wanted to order something different, but I stuck with it. I tried not to be upset after I ate it. It was a successful day for me! I got a lot done and my parents said they are so happy with how the garage looks 🙂

Hope you had a good day!

Winston Churchill Knew What He Was Talking About

“It is not enough that we do our best; sometimes we must do what is required.”

“Continuous effort – not strength or intelligence – is the key to unlocking our potential.”

“Never give in. Never give in. Never, never, never, never—in nothing, great or small, large or petty—never give in, except to convictions of honour and good sense. Never yield to force. Never yield to the apparently overwhelming might of the enemy.”

“If you are going through hell, keep going.”

Quotes from Winston Churchill

Yesterday was a good, but very challenging day. My meal and snack times were all over the place but I did what was required and I didn’t skip one. I really wanted to, but I didn’t. I know there were a few bubbles that I didn’t get around to filling, but they were primarily a fruit, dairy, veggie, and maybe a few fats and starches. I’ll take you through my day and that will hopefully explain the difficulties I experienced.

I began my day by getting in my 1.5 mile run. It is incredible how much better I felt not running on a full stomach! When I got back from my run I had a glass of chocolate milk and then did a little stretching.Image I played a game of sudoku before fixing my breakfast. I made Madelyne an omelet before fixing my own. It was a spinach, onion, pepper, cheese, 2 egg omelet. I then added dried blueberries, a bagel with cinnamon cream cheese and a pumpkin tea latte.Image

Once we finished up breakfast I got ready for the barn. Madelyne came with me today and she just loved giving Ray, Robert and Tilley (one of the cats) her attention. I started off in the arena, long lining Vinnie, but then I quickly moved to the round pen just because it is easier to keep Vinnie in a circle. I would have been running all over the arena if I stayed up there haha. Vinnie was good, he was just kicking a lot because I was really asking him to go forward and he would not pick up the pace. Little stinker. He still deserved his apple because he was a good boy and he eventually did what I asked of him. Plus I cut him some slack since it has been upwards of a week since I long lined him.Image

When we got home from the barn in was a quarter till noon. I really didn’t want to have my snack and I just wanted to wait another 30 minutes and have a nice lunch. If it weren’t for Madelyne I would have done that. She decided we should both have a snack and then we would have a late lunch out before picking Jennifer up from the airport. I had oatmeal and then did dishes before I jumped in the shower to get ready to run some errands. Image

I first stopped at CVS to pick up my prescription and then we were on our way to Raleigh to go to Brier Creek. Maddie and I went to Dicks Sporting Goods to find a gift for my dad. Once we got his gift picked out we did a little “shopping” of our own. We just looked for some outfit ideas for the Krispy Kreme Challenge. We want to wear super bright crazy outfits so we were looking for insane running tights and shirts. Of course everything was really expensive. I will have to save my money and then maybe I will go to the Nike Outlet to find something. Next we went to Noodles and Company for lunch. I have been wanting shrimp for a while, so I got my favorite Japanese Pan Noodles with shrimp.Image Getting Noodles and Company is easy for me because I can easily look up the nutrition to fill out my bubbles, but I didn’t look to see if they offered fruit as a side or if they had a serving size of milk. I guess I just didn’t feel comfortable asking for anything additional. I decided I would just make up for it with my snack. It was a late lunch though, I didn’t finish eating it till 3. Then we had to go straight to the airport to pick up my sister whose flight landed at 3:25. Maddie and I tried to sneak up on her and scare her when we found her, but she saw us before we got close enough. She still was scared though I think because she saw another woman who she thought was me for a second. We went to baggage claim to get her bag, which took a few minutes longer than expected. Once we got piled into Old Blue (my 87 Cavalier) we headed to the Sheraton Hotel because my dad was taking his yearly CPA class there and he was finished at 4:30. I think he wanted to have a drink with Jen and Mad at the bar because he said it was a nice bar and he called me earlier to suggest that idea to them. Jen and Mad weren’t really in the mood for a drink so we decided just to head home. I was going to go home anyways because I needed to have my snack and quickly get ready to meet at Josh’s house for his birthday dinner. Since it was so late, again, I didn’t really feel like having a snack, but I knew I needed to push myself and have one anyways. Once I got home I grabbed my snack (a LUNA bar – which did not fill up the bubbles I intended my snack to fill, but it was something just to eat for snack that wouldn’t be too filling) and my laptop so I could decide what to order at dinner so I wouldn’t be freaking out at the restaurant. Madelyne was also nice enough to quickly straighten my hair while I ate my snack 🙂 I then watched as Jen and Mad unwrapped all of the gifts my mom got at school. A lot of it was food: chocolate chip bread, different chocolates, cookies, caramel corn, etc. so I was happy it was time for me to leave because all of that was overwhelming. Image

I was at Josh’s house by six and then we left at 6:10. Justin drove us and we stopped on the way to pick up Zavian. We had reservations at Chammps at Southpoint for 7. We met Tyler and Quinn there. Five other people were supposed to be there as well, but they sadly bailed, so I was glad that I still went even though my sister just got home. I was the only girl, which I am used to haha. 3 other girls were supped to come, but none of them made it. That was perfectly fine by me though. I ordered the Fresco Chicken Tacos and it was much bigger than I expected!Image I ate two of the three tacos. I had a few bites of the corn/bean salsa stuff, but I wasn’t the biggest fan of that, but the tacos were very tasty! I convinced Josh to order a drink called the Maple Leaf. If I am remembering correctly it was Crown Royal, Coca Cola and a strip of bacon. Josh let us all have a tiny sip of it and it was so strong! It was good though. He loved it and said he was going to have me choose his drinks from now on. Tyler left early, but the rest of us stayed and talked until 9:15. I ended up having a really good time and again, I was glad I went. They wanted to go see Anchorman 2 but they gave me the option of driving me back to Josh’s so I could go home to family. It was so kind of them to consider that and even though I felt a little bad about making Justin drive all over Durham, I took them up on the offer. I was tired anyways. Plus my sister wanted to go see Anchorman 2 haha. Justin said he didn’t mind, he really likes driving. Zavian and Quinn headed over to the theater while Justin and Josh drove me back. I am feeling so much more comfortable around them. Like I feel like I am able to be myself and I’m not scared to speak up and say something. I got an invite to go shoot guns next week. I don’t think I have ever shot one before but I have been wanting to learn so I accepted! Of course I hope my parents are okay with that haha…

When I got home I tried to think of the best snack to have. When I planned what to order for dinner I went ahead and bubbled in the entire meal, but since I didn’t end up eating it all I wasn’t really sure where I was at with my bubbles for the day. I don’t like that feeling at all. It left me really struggling with what the best thing for snack would be. I ended up going with an apple, a vanilla pudding, and a serving size of mini Snickers (4 pieces).Image I slept on the couch so that Madelyne and Jennifer could sleep in separate rooms because Maddie can’t deal with Jennifer’s snoring. Plus I think I just wanted to sleep on the couch haha. I didn’t get the best night of sleep, but then again I never do. I did have a really interesting dream though. In my dream I felt really special, which is perhaps the feeling I have been missing out on in real life (although I am working on it!). So details are a little foggy, but in my dream there were these strange occurrences that could only really be caused my something supernatural. Then there was this guy – very attractive, every single girl was obsessed with him – that was quiet and mysterious. He for some reason decided to show me that he had special gifts. Basically almost any super power you could think of. He was strong, he could burn things with a touch of his finger, he could walk on water. He was basically an alien that looked human. And he chose me. He was everything I wanted in a guy: quiet, incredibly sweet with a dangerous side, different than anyone else. In my dream we would be with a group of people and it was almost like the two of us were a secret but not? I don’t know, it’s hard to explain. I also had the cutest welsh corgi puppy ever. It was a good dream. Made me like a I had a special connection with someone, which must be something I have been wanting since I had a dream about it. It was a weird dream though haha. I woke up very early and tried to go back to sleep but eventually I just gave up.

Now I am off to start my day with a delicious breakfast! It is a rest day today so no worries about running on a full stomach haha. I hope everyone had a fun-filled Friday and is ready to enjoy this beautiful Saturday!

Lomi Lomi

Today Madelyne and I went for our massages. We each had the Hawaiian Lomi Lomi massage and it was incredible. We went to The Retreat for our appointments at noon. It was the most relaxing experience. The tropical smell of the massage oil and the soft music and methodical strokes had me in a trance. It had me so relaxed all I have wanted to do ever since is sleep! My masseuse told me I would sleep well tonight, and I sure hope that it true because I haven’t been sleeping well at all lately! If I sleep like a rock tonight I am going to have to get massages regularly. That was my first one ever and after that I just can’t wait till I get another one!

Last night for dinner I had salad and a french bread cheese and veggie pizza.Image For my snack I had a Chobani flip, crackers and trail mix for my bedtime snack.Image That flavor was better than I was expecting, so it was a yummy surprise.

This morning I woke up and decided to try out an app I have on my iPad. It is called Daily Yoga (I got it from another app, Apps Gone Free) and I chose a 15 minute video for beginner yoga sequences. It was super easy and didn’t really feel like anything at all, especially because it was 15 minutes and half of it was just sitting there breathing. After that I made my breakfast. I fixed an egg, veggie and cheese sandwich, a pumpkin tea latte and dried blueberries <– SO GOOD!Image Then I wrote Madelyne a little note saying I was at the barn and would be back soon (she was still asleep).

When I got to the barn Renee was just heading back to her house to get ready for work and she said Vinnie was still eating. I guess I was out there earlier than I usually am. Since I had to wait for Vinnie to finish his food, I figured I wouldn’t have enough time to wait for his feed to digest before I worked him so I just groomed him, clipped him, and then took him up to the arena to do just a few minutes of ground work. 5 minutes of work is better than 0. I took before and after pictures of Vinnie’s bridle path and whiskers. My clippers are dull, cheap ones for people that I got at Walmart, so I’m not sure how much better he actually looks haha. ImageImageImageImage This is a brave cat, isn’t it?Image

I came home and quickly scarfed down a bagel with vanilla almond butter before I jumped in the shower and got ready to head into Durham for my massage!Image After our massages were over, Maddie and I went to Whole Foods to grab lunch. While I was there I ran into a girl I went to high school with. She plays softball in college, but doesn’t really love it anymore. She is just playing because it is paying for her education. I talked to her for a few minutes and told her about what I have been doing this past year. She said that she completely understood what it was like. She went through a phase when thoughts about food and being thin completely consumed her. She never let it get bad though, but she said she could see how difficult it was. It was nice to talk to her for a few minutes. I went back to selecting my lunch items and went with a repeat of my last lunch from Whole Foods. I got a sandwich, fruits and veggies, yogurt and a WhatsoNutso bar.Image We went to my mom’s school and ate our lunch and then we went to New Hope Commons to go to Barnes and Noble. I saw a few books that looked good, but nothing that was screaming my name so I decided to save my gift card from Baba. We were going to go to Michaels as well, but we decided just to come home because we were both so sleepy!

Once we got home I folded laundry and unloaded the dishwasher before grabbing my laptop to do some puzzles. Maddie crashed right on the couch but said she never really fell asleep. I went to the couch with my snack of baked Cheetos and trail mix.Image When my mom got home our energy picked up enough to do some knitting until dinner time. We had pasta mixed with a little pesto and asparagus, roasted yellow squash and zucchini and rotisserie chicken. It was pretty flavorful.Image

Now we are all just relaxing and doing our own thing 🙂

Tomorrow is going to be a day kind of full of unknowns. The Reuse Warehouse is delivering our wood and table, but I have no idea at what time. My dad is in a CE class all day so I need to make sure I am home when they drop everything off. I am hoping it is early in the morning so I can make it out to the barn and then get Jennifer at the airport in the afternoon! I am so excited to have her and Madelyne here at the same time! I was also invited to Josh’s birthday dinner tomorrow night and to really really push myself socially I accepted. I feel a little bad going out with friends the first night my sister will be home, but my parents told me I could go (and probably should). It is going to be a larger group that I am used to, and I have no idea where Justin has made the reservations. So it is going to be a challenging dinner for me, but one I will be able to do! I also have to run my 1.5 miles tomorrow! So much to do! I just wish I knew what time the delivery will be coming so I could plan out what my day will look like… Oh well. This is something I can’t control so I just need to accept it so I can enjoy the day. Wish me luck!


Hi guys! Today was the best day I think I have had in a while! I felt like I was doing things that a normal twenty year old would do. I spent the majority of the day with my new friends, just kind of going with the flow. I had so much fun and I felt so at ease with these guys. I know that Josh knows about my situation with recovering from an eating disorder, but I am not sure if Justin and Tyler know. I didn’t let that stop me from living in the moment and enjoying good food with amazing company! 🙂 I reminded myself that I am not going to let myself believe that others are judging me based on what I eat. Justin actually said something that really stuck with me. It was related to tattoos, but still it was so inspirational. He said “whenever people tell me that I am ruining my future or if I am worried about my future with the few tattoos I have, I tell them ‘I may not have a future. You never know how long you are going to live, so why worry about the future. I will cross that bridge when I get there.'” I thought that was just so amazing to have that mentality. I mean, yeah you aren’t going to go crazy with things, but why not enjoy the present and do what pleases you?

So this morning I relaxed some before fixing my mom and I our breakfast. I repeated yesterday’s meal and had an egg, veggie, cheese bagel sandwich with orange juice and a chai tea latte. I helped my mom with some dishes and then made a pumpkin pie for tomorrow! I LOVE PUMPKIN PIE. We then got my sister a plane ticket for Christmastime so she can visit for the holidays. For my snack I had a sunflower seed butter sandwich. I always forget I have the sunflower butter and I was happy I remember it because it was so good. Then I got ready for my day of being social! I met everyone else at Josh’s house and then we went to Cracker Barrel for lunch. I ordered the Chicken n Dumplings with steamed broccoli and apple slices. They were out of broccoli. How dumb. They brought me double apple slices though. I still only ate one portion of apple slices.20131127-213030.jpgIt was pretty good and I felt comfortable with the food and with the conversation. I was just so happy that I felt like I fit in with them! Justin ended up paying for my lunch and it was so nice of him! We sat at Cracker Barrel and chatted for a while and then after we left Justin drove us all around. We just went driving around Durham. I feel like there is still so much of Durham that I haven’t seen. We went pretty deep into the ghetto and of course that is when I really needed to use the bathroom. I had to hold it for so long (at least it felt really long to me haha) because they didn’t want to stop at a sketchy place and risk me getting killed. I am sure that was a little exaggerated, but it was a nice gesture. Next we drove all the way to Roxboro to go to Palace Pointe where we bowled three games. I had so much fun and I didn’t let myself get angry for not being the best. I ended up coming in 3rd twice and then in the second game Tyler and I tied for 3rd. They wouldn’t let me pay again! They are just so entertaining haha. Once we were done bowling we drove back to Durham and they starting talking about dinner plans. I texted my mom to ask if I should do dinner with them and her and my dad said that yes I should, so I did! We went to Harris Teeter and picked out meat to grill and some sides to go along with it. Tyler and I picked out some nice looking filet mignon and then we got some potatoes, asparagus and texas toast.20131127-213449.jpgI marinated the asparagus in balsamic vinaigrette and then Josh’s dad put some amazing seasonings on the steak. It all turned out so delicious and I was so proud of myself for not restricting or avoiding any of the foods that we prepared. It was so funny, on the way to Harris Teeter I said that I was going to pay for groceries since they wouldn’t let me pay for anything else. They all went on to say that I was their guest and that I would never pay for anything when I was with them. I asked when I wouldn’t be considered a guest anymore and they said technically now, but that I still wasn’t allowed to pay for anything. They called it the law. They are just too nice to me. 🙂 I felt so normal today and it was a great feeling. The only bad thing was that I didn’t have my second snack. I would still consider today to be a tremendous success because I pushed myself socially (and I ended up being completely comfortable) and I had 2 meals in a row that had me out of my element. It was almost like a nice little friendsgiving (Thanksgiving with friends) before the big Turkey Day tomorrow.

Tomorrow I think my parents and I are just going to relax and cook up some traditional Thanksgiving foods. I am going to try and finish my closet and then I would like to go see Vinnie since I haven’t been the past couple days. I just hope the weather is better! I have had enough of this rain!

What are your Thanksgiving Plans?

P.S. Sorry for not having pictures of my breakfast or snack. My computer is being slow again and not wanting to upload the pictures on my computer that are from my camera. So only iPhone photos made it on the post today, and that was because I uploaded them into the post from my phone. Oh technology…

Inching My Way!

I feel like I am finally inching my way closer to everything! Closer to my goals, closer to finishing my closet, closer to being fully excited about what my future holds…

E’s and A’s

Last night’s dinner was delicious! I made a 3 cheese grilled cheese and had stewed squash and tomato basil soup. Image

Last night for my snack I had Greek yogurt topped with a few frozen strawberries (thawed) and a chocolate chip cookie dough protein Luna bar.Image I have to say the bar was not my favorite. It was good, but I felt like I had acid reflux disease or something… weird.

This morning I woke up and make myself another delicious bagel-wich! I made my egg with peppers, onion and spinach and then topped it with cheese and hot sauce. I had it with a glass of orange juice and a chai latte. Happy Beth 🙂Image

I worked on a few puzzles before I went to work on my closet. I sanded down all of the spackling I did yesterday and then vacuumed the dust up before priming a few spots that were questionable. Then I fixed my morning snack. I had maple and brown sugar oatmeal with spiced pumpkin seeds. That oatmeal is so sweet, but delicious!Image

I then spent the rest of the morning painting my closet. The primer dried quickly and I decided to use the leftover paint from my bathroom to slap a coat on the walls of my closet. It looks a million times better already. That was really the only activity I had going on today at home. When I finished painting I made my lunch. I decided to use up leftovers so I fixed myself some more mini meatball subs and enjoyed them with carrots, an apple and yogurt.Image My dad was watching The Fugitive so I multitasked and ate my lunch, watched the movie and played sudoku. Killin’ it. Once I finished eating I was off to the showers to get ready for my afternoon appointments!

Appointment with Mary

Ok, this session was GREAT. It began with all of us (my parents, Mary, and myself) and we just talked about how the past week went and what some challenges were. I talked about how I was able to do an exchange one night with my bubbles but it left me feeling a little uncomfortable. So she talked about how I could go about that in a way to feel more at ease. After that part of the session Mary and I went back to her office and talked about an activity that I did from the workbook. I took a little quiz to see how I dealt with emotions and feelings. The first part analyzed my willingness to experience my emotions. I scored on the lower side, revealing that I tend to ignore or avoid my feelings. I predicted that would be the case because that is how I have always been. I just don’t like to talk about my feelings or let my emotions be seen by others. Something I need to work on though because sharing my feelings and emotions with people will only make us grow closer. The second part of the quiz analyzed my action, or how much I let my emotions influence my day to day activities. I scored about midrange on this part. I tend to not let my emotions really get in my way of completing a task, but I do let me emotions stop me from joining in on things such as social events. Mary helped me to realize some things that would be very good for me to work on. If I promise to do something, I need to follow through with it. I have been known to be quite the flake, so by sticking to my commitments others will be able to depend on me. Also, if someone is in a difficult situation, instead of not doing anything in fear of what the right this to do is, I just need to do something. After looking at my combined scores it turns out my score equals that to the average from a group of regular customer service center employees in England. So it turns out lots of other (normal?) people feel the exact same way as I do! Once we were done with the workbook Mary and I looked over the list I made last week of different things I might enjoy doing with my future. It was kind of a long list, so Mary suggested I mark which ones could be achieved in a similar work place or in unison with each other. It was amazing how many of them could be tailored to accommodate my interests! We spent an extra 30 minutes just discussing all of the different possibilities and it got me so excited and I feel like I am no longer living in fear of what my future holds for me! Hooray! I just need to decide which ones I would like to keep as a hobby and which ones I would truly like to pursue. She assured me that nothing was permanent though and that I could change my path if I desired. She gave me several things to look up online and I can’t wait to explore them and learn about them! At the end when we finished categorizing my list she made a suggestion that I do photography and a blog for a company who doesn’t have the time or resources to keep up with their online community. She even said she might get me to do a blog and photography for her whenever she gets her kitchen and starts with classes! Mary has so many amazing ideas of what she would like to do with her little cottage. It would be so amazing to work with her and create a blog. I would get so much joy out of that! Depending on how that pans out I could always try and find another company that is in need of someone to handle their website. I feel like I could even do that for any of the ideas on my list. Do a blog and photos for an equine group, for a local cafe/business, for a home renovation/project group… The ideas are endless! I ate my snack once we left. It was just some trail mix and caramel crisps.

Session with Lori

I had another good appointment with Lori as well! I feel like for the majority of the time we talked about my social goals and challenges. I feel like Lori was getting a good sense about how to push me up to my level 8 haha! Lori talked to me about the difference between having a global view versus a local view on things. I am kind of both, but closer to the localized side. This all began by discussing our Friday night dinner at Firebirds. My dad mentioned that the dinner I ordered consisted of my safe foods, but it was challenging because of the proportion and not know how it was prepared. I talked about how I felt like I had rules that I needed to follow when placed in a difficult situation. Those rules were given to me by Eduardo, but I have been doing my best not to follow them. That led us to the globalized perspective versus the localized. Localized personalities tend to need to follow rules and do everything precisely whereas globalized ones are able to see things all over or in general. I probably just did a terrible job explaining that and there’s a good chance I got them backwards. Either way, it was eye opening and we walked away with a set of new goals!

My mom said Amber gave me this and I can’t wait to try it!Image

Tomorrow I am hanging with the guys. We are all meeting at Josh’s house and then I think we are going Cracker Barrel for lunch. I am a little nervous, but it will be a great big challenge that I can cross off my list! I sent my parents to dinner without me so they could have a date night (and so I could write this post and then watch my tv shows hehe). I am eating a stuffed squash from Trader Joe’s and it is delicious! It’s like a turkey squash pot pie.Image

Have a great night and a wonderful Wednesday!


Well, my Sunday is off to a rocky start haha. I guess it’s nothing too bad, just feels like bad luck. This morning I woke up and then had to deal with plumbing issues. That’s not a metaphor for anything. Literal plumbing issues. Tons of fun right there… Then when I was fixing my breakfast I was using the fancy espresso/latte/coffee machine that my aunt got my mom a really long time ago, and when I was about to steam my milk for my chai tea latte, it used up all the water. Boo… I thought I could pour more water into the top of it, but it was so hot and I didn’t want to break it (because that would happen to me). Microwave it was.Image So I exaggerated some, but I hope things go a little smoother for me for the rest of the day. Since I missed blogging yesterday I feel like I have to much to catch up on! Where to begin…

Friday Night

When my dad got home from getting the RV fixed my mom and I made dinner. We decided not to go out just because my dad had a busy day. So we used what we had on hand, which just happened to be burgers. Two Friday nights in a row with burgers! I think I’m all burgered out. It was good though. We had mixed veggies and tots as our sides.Image Then for my bed time snack I went with a pumpkin greek yogurt from Trader Joe’s 🙂ImageImage How did that get in there??!


Yesterday started off like our normal Saturdays. I woke up and fixed my breakfast. My mom helped me to use the steamer for my chai latte. Perhaps I just need supervision to operate that thing. I heated up one of my breakfast sandwiches and had a sliced banana with pomegranate seeds. Very good!Image I worked on my puzzles and talked with my mom. We planned out the upcoming week’s dinners and then went crazy with cleaning the kitchen!Image It almost doesn’t even look like the same kitchen! For my snack I had pretzels and a caramel nut brownie Luna bar.ImageImagePretty good, but not my favorite flavor. Then I did a few more chores and then went to the couch to relax. This is when my Saturday turned into an 8 on my social and food anxiety scale. My friend Josh said that he and his friends had an extra ticket to the Duke vs Miami game and he invited me to go with them. At first I just wanted to stay home and stay in my comfort zone and plan out what needed to be done for my closet project. My dad told me I needed to go because Duke has a good team this year and because what else was I going to do? When an opportunity for a challenge presents itself I have really been trying to push myself to conquering the challenge. So I accepted the invitation. I was nervous because I wasn’t sure if it would be awkward or not since I didn’t know his friends very well. I have always been really shy and social situations have always caused me anxiety. Plus, I wasn’t sure how I was going to deal with being out of my comfort zone and making sure I stayed on top of my bubbles. I had no choice but to quickly get ready and plan my lunch and snack. I scarfed down my cheese pretzel nuggets and then ate my apple and bagel on the way.Image I felt much better knowing I had my lunch and snack planned out. That way I wouldn’t get anxiety at the game, and I wouldn’t have to pay copious amounts of money for concessions. Josh and his friends, Justin and Tyler, ended up being really chill and I wasn’t uncomfortable or nervous at all. It probably helped that I didn’t have a huge crush on any of them like a 13 year old girl on Justin Bieber… That always takes my anxiety way down to a normal level haha. I have been around Justin a few times before, so I knew him a decent amount. I knew Tyler, but I never really talked to him before, but we bonded over dead people. I know, I know, that’s really weird. He works at a funeral home and he loves it and I worked on cadavers a lot for a few classes I took at Appalachian. So we had something to talk about haha. They all were extremely friendly and so they made the social challenge very easy for me. Plus Josh knows of my situation, so I knew he would be understanding if I was having any struggles. The game was so much fun!ImageImage Duke won 48-30. I was shocked! The students stormed the field. ImageImage After the game we stopped at Don Cecilios for dinner. I was planning on just going home to have lasagna, but they all wanted to somewhere and I really didn’t want to be complicated. So that kept me at a level 8. I ordered a chicken burrito with rice and beans and I ate the majority of it.Image They all are really easy to talk to. Well, for me it’s more like listen to haha. They had so many inside jokes and they just converse at a ridiculously fast pace. They are all pretty southern, so it’s not that they were talking too fast, they just had so many jokes or comebacks that they fired at each other with impressive quickness. Safe to say I was lost for over half of the conversations they had, but Justin and Tyler didn’t hesitate to fill me in on what they were talking about when they noticed the confusion on my face. After dinner we all went back to Josh’s house and watched Olympus Has Fallen. It was a lot better than I was expecting it to be! I had fun with them and I was glad I decided to join them on their activities for the day. I was proud of myself for leaving my shell and doing things that would normally give me so much anxiety. I am learning that if I just relax and enjoy the current moment without over thinking my anxiety level is substantially lower! Upon departing from Josh’s house I thanked Josh for the invite, Justin for the extra ticket, and then was offered a tour of a funeral home by Tyler.

When I got home I snuggled up on the couch and had pumpkin green yogurt again for my snack. A few random things that happened yesterday: My parents decided to go to the Lake in the RV for the night since I made plans. I was so happy they decided to get away because they deserved some daughterless time haha. I also heard from Em, my roommate from last Spring Semester at App. She was diagnosed with thyroid cancer and is scared about an upcoming appointment in December. She said it hasn’t spread any where so she should be good. I told her to keep me updated and to let me know if she ever needed anything. She asked how I was doing and was so happy to hear I was doing better. It was so nice to catch up with her! Looking back on it, yesterday was a good day for me. I can’t be sure if I filled all my bubbles, but I defeated many of my anxieties!